There have been many moments in these past few months where I thought, “God, are you sure?” In Albanian churches, Italian classrooms, hospital pharmacies, and on planes I wasn’t even sure I was supposed to be on. These past few months have taught me what trusting my Creator actually looks like, not just in theory, but in practice.

After the life-changing experience of sharing the love of Jesus throughout Albania and Italy, I couldn’t ignore the opportunity to continue ministry in Mexico with the same people I had grown to love. We would be living in an orphanage and pouring into the children there, and I truly felt called to go. However, when I came home, almost everyone around me shut the idea down. Mexico was too dangerous. Another semester would be too expensive. Putting my life on hold for three more months didn’t seem wise for my future.

The more I prayed about it, the more I felt drawn toward Mexico. The more I talked to others, the more reasons I heard not to go. It would have been easier to stay home, start the life waiting for me, and avoid the stress of fundraising and uncertainty. Slowly, I started to convince myself that maybe staying was the smarter choice. But I couldn’t fully let it go. Even when it seemed unlikely that I would actually leave, I continued preparing as if I might. My parents began praying about it too, but they didn’t give me an answer until the day before I was supposed to leave.

On the day I was set to fly out, I realized I had a mandatory doctor’s appointment on January 2 in order to continue receiving insulin. I was supposed to meet my team at the Atlanta airport at 8:00 a.m. the next morning. We didn’t even know if the pharmacy would be able to fill my prescriptions in time for my flight that night, and my ticket was already bought.

Everything felt like it was stacked against me. The timing didn’t make sense. The finances didn’t make sense. The risks didn’t make sense. But every time I sat alone in my quiet time, I felt the same gentle pull to go.

Trusting God in that moment didn’t feel comfortable or secure. It meant surrendering my need for certainty, approval, and control. It meant stepping forward without guarantees. And I knew that if I stayed simply because it was safer or easier, I would always wonder what would have happened if I had listened. So I chose to trust Him. 

Not because everything made sense. Not because I had a guarantee that it would all work out. But because I knew that obedience mattered more than comfort, and trust sometimes means stepping forward before you see the whole picture.

The doctor’s appointment worked out. The pharmacy filled my prescription. I made the flight. And just like that, the thing that felt impossible the week before became reality. Not because I had everything perfectly figured out, but because God made a way when I chose to say yes.

Since being here in Mexico, living in the orphanage and spending my days playing with kids, teaching English, and helping build an urban garden, I’ve been reminded daily that trust isn’t a one-time decision. It’s constant. It’s trusting Him with safety in places people warned me about. It’s trusting Him with provision when fundraising feels overwhelming. It’s trusting Him when I don’t have every answer about what comes next.

There are still moments where I think, “God, are you sure?” But I’m learning that trust doesn’t mean the questions disappear. It means choosing to move forward even when they don’t.

If the past few months have taught me anything, it’s that God doesn’t always give crystal clear instructions or remove every obstacle. Sometimes, He simply asks for obedience and reveals the rest step by step. Looking back at the valleys in my life, I can see that He was never absent; He was preparing me. And now, even here, in another country, surrounded by children who need love and consistency, I can see that His timing has always been better than mine.

Trusting Him hasn’t been easy. It hasn’t always felt logical. But it has been worth it.

And I’m grateful that I got on that plane. 

And as I continue this season here in Mexico, I’m still trusting Him with provision. I haven’t fully reached my fundraising goal yet, and that is another space where I’m learning to surrender control. If you feel called to partner with me, whether through prayer or financial support, I would love to invite you into what God is doing here!

The link to my fundraising page: https://adventuresinmissions.servicereef.com/events/adventures-in-missions-3/spring-2026-journey-school-chiapas-mexico-and-guatemala/participants/bella-falkenau